Jokes | Phuks!

28

Why does the Norwegian Navy place barcodes on all of their vessals?

posted by [Deleted]

23

Peppa Pig jigsaw puzzle (ourbestbites.com)

posted by ScorpioGlitch

21

I really want to buy one of those grocery checkout dividers but the lady behind the counter keeps putting it back

posted by jobes

20

I like sugar or sweetener. I'm ambidextrose.

posted by ScorpioGlitch

20

Give a man a fish and he can eat for a day. Give a woman a fish and you're "that weird fish guy."

posted by jobes

20

I have a lot of jokes about unemployed people

posted by ohphukimintrouble

19

If someone asks you to spell "Part A" backwards, don't do it. It's a trap.

posted by jobes

19

I tried to learn how to drive a stick but couldn't find the manual.

posted by ScorpioGlitch

18

What is the difference between a dirty transport terminal and a lobster with breast implants?

posted by [Deleted]

18

13...13...13...13..

posted by [Deleted]

18

Did you hear Monica Lewinsky is becoming a Republican? The democrats left a bad taste in her mouth.

posted by jobes

18

How do you wake up Lady Gaga?

posted by ScorpioGlitch

17

I recently got a Delorian but I only drive it from time to time.

posted by ScorpioGlitch

16

The swordfish has few predators to worry about in the wild,

posted by [Deleted]

16

The other day, my wife asked me to pass her lipstick but I accidentally passed her a glue stick. She still isn’t talking to me.

posted by ScorpioGlitch

16

How much do pirates pay for earrings?

posted by ScorpioGlitch

16

Why don't chinese kids believe in Santa Claus?

posted by jobes

16

I don’t like the Asians, they bombed Pearl Harbor...

posted by jobes

16

What was so wrong with the USA that they had to go and make USB?

posted by ScorpioGlitch

16

A study recently found that 3.14% of all sailors are actually pi-rates

posted by ScorpioGlitch

16

A husband buys a dozen panties of the same color for his wife...

posted by jobes

15

Why is the prisoners favorite punctuation mark the period?

posted by OeeThaGreat

15

I forgot how to write 51, 6, and 500 in Roman numerals. I'm LIVID.

posted by ScorpioGlitch

15

What do they call a beautiful girl in Northern England?

posted by Boukert

15

How do you get a nun to have sex?

posted by ScorpioGlitch

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