Jokes | Phuks!

13

Dying and coming back as a redneck is called "reintarnation."

posted by ScorpioGlitch

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11

A Cowboy told his grandson the secret to long life.

posted by GoatsShadow

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9

She had a tattoo of the devil on one knee and a tattoo of fire on the other.

posted by GuyIDisagreeWith

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12

What does the sign on an out of business brothel say?

posted by PhunkyPlatypus

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11

A woman tried to stab her husband's penis but missed and stabbed his thigh. She was later charged with a mis-da-weiner

posted by jobes

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12

A three legged, orphaned dog limps into a bar

posted by PhunkyPlatypus

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13

Can't marry him

posted by TeraMarie

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8

I bet the guy who invented those Russian stacking dolls was really full of himself.

posted by ScorpioGlitch

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7

When you turn 18, I'm taking you to the strip club...

posted by jobes

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8

I don't like orchestras because there's too much sax and violins.

posted by ScorpioGlitch

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12

If you think your job is worthless, always remember that there's some poor fool who puts turns signals on BMWs.

posted by ScorpioGlitch

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4

After a long day watching the kids I'm so tired I could eat a horse

posted by GoatsShadow

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8

Circumcision doctors don’t get paid all that much..

posted by pembo210

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3

I'm almost done I just cleaned out my fridge... now I just have to take the dishwasher to the gynecologist

posted by GoatsShadow

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14

I have a Russian friend who's a sound technician.

posted by IsThisUsernameTaken

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8

Someone help me start this knock knock joke...

posted by BUTTHOLE_EMPRESS

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17

I recently got a Delorian but I only drive it from time to time.

posted by ScorpioGlitch

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10

I wrote a song about small, burrowing animals.

posted by Polsaker

comments (5) report

10

You just can't trust atoms...

posted by ScorpioGlitch

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11

Remember to wear a condom next time you have sex...

posted by jobes

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8

Everyone Knows Dave

posted by GoatsShadow

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6

An atheist and a Jew sat on a bench overlooking the Grand Canyon

posted by BUTTHOLE_EMPRESS

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18

How do you wake up Lady Gaga?

posted by ScorpioGlitch

comments (8) report

7

The invention of the shovel was ground breaking.

posted by OeeThaGreat

comments (2) report

5

What do you call a male ladybug?

posted by ScorpioGlitch

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