You could start by telling the story of how you got your black eye and broken hand... Godspeed. If imaginary internet points were cents you'd have $100.
It's really a dull story. I woke up at 9:30, got an update on my brother, messaged my managers that I was going to be late since I got home late after visiting him at the hospital, then I got out of bed and next thing I know I regain consciousness at 9pm and have no recollection of anything that happened for 11 hours. I was super confused, went to the ER. They were going to admit me because my blood pressure was crazy low for me. I told them I'd rather go home since I had to feed the cats and whatnot...so they let me go after 10 hours. I did get to re-watch Braveheart on tv there, so that's a plus
I'll catch up to that 20k mark someday. I have a lot more shitposting to do