Australian birds have weaponized fire because what we really need now is something else to make us afraid

I KNEW IT! Those fucking BIRDS are going to take over and destroy us all! They've been plotting it for years and now they know how to use fire! Soon they'll have metal work, gunpowder, industrial machinery, electricity, space travel... WHY DOES NOBODY ELSE SEE WHAT'S HAPPENING HERE?! AM I THE ONLY ONE WHO CAN SEE WHAT'S GOING ON?! Then I guess it's up to me alone...