...There is not a single vegetable that is sexier or more powerful than broccoli. Especially not cabbage, which is the filthiest most garbage excuse for a vegetable on this planet.
Here's the deal: Broccoli is usually shipped to us in these waxed cardboard boxes, with crushed ice mixed in with the broccoli to keep it crisp. When you hold a stock of broccoli right out of the box, you get the sense that the broccoli is strong. The skin is robust, and the crown sturdy. The time spent in with the ice has hardened it to the likeness of steel.
Clearly, it is the most masculine of all vegetables.
Cabbage, though? Cabbage is absolute garbage, and I consider it unethical that we even put it on the shelves. While we'd go through at least 6 boxes of broccoli on a slow day, a busy day will only see us exhaust about one case of cabbage. And that's even after all the cosmetic surgery we put them through to make them look vaguely more presentable. We have to tear off a bunch of the outer leaves, so it looks round and symmetrical. We also have to cut off the stems at the bottom, because they're brown and disgusting. They just ship it to us like that in dry, plastic cases, where it's not unlikely some bugs got to it during the journey.
Broccoli needs no such cosmetic surgery, we just grab it out of the boxes, and customers tear through it, grabbing as many powerful, sexy stocks as they can.
So if you're still on the fence, remember the word of someone who sees cases of this stuff every day. Cabbage is disgusting rubbery garbage, and broccoli is the food of the Gods.
Hear, hear! The lad knows the truth!
Superior Broccoli genetics cannot be washed out. They are shipped to the people in icy cryopods to preserve their natural glory, much like the Nord preserves his strength in the cold of the Galdhøpiggen.
Indeed, Broccoli is the Aryan Green, the dominant species in the grocery store.