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I wrote up my AskPhuks yesterday out of anger and a bit out of disgust with my current state in life.

I'm writing this post right now because I want to say the same thing to ALL of the users who commented, and I think its easier doing it this way than replying the same thing to dozens of different comments in that thread.

After reading all of your responses I feel better about my situation. All of you who replied gave me a lot of words of encouragement.

If I didn't know any better I would have thought that you all were a remnant of my grandpa, logging in with different usernames to drop snippets of sound advice. In a way, you were doing that.

So thank you, Grandpa Phuks. Many of you echoed each other without realizing it. The common denominators in your arguments were that my time on this earth is more valuable than anything else. You taught me that I needed to focus on my true needs instead of the wants that society was putting into my head.

You all spoke of how I should change my mindset, and that once I did that an entirely new set of possibilities would make themselves known to me.

You all repeated the same thing : work hard. I understand that. The reason for my despair yesterday was that I have been working hard and I just don't seem to be getting anywhere.

But you guys stopped me in my crybaby state and pointed something out : Quit your bitching and look at all of us. We are all working hard for the little bit we have in this life.

Seriously, thank you all. Today I have off from work, and I'm going to organize my cashflow like you said. I will write up a ledger and begin to track every phukking penny that comes and goes in my life. I'm going to start being social to the point of discomfort, networking nonstop. I'm going to look at local places around me that need help or require a service.

I woke up today and cringed when I remembered what I had wrote yesterday. I was expecting to log in and see a lot of you guys putting me down and snubbing my tears. I was expecting my post to have been buried and forgotten.

That wasn't the case though. You motherphukkers responded truthfully. And now my kvetching is on the front page to remind me that I'm still a soft crybaby at times, but also that people do care. I love you phuks.

/u/CDanger

/u/Sarcastaway

/u/E-werd

/u/Polsaker

/u/unabashed_centrist

/u/KillEmAll

/u/saverem

/u/chmod

/u/hereforaminuet

/u/Mattvision

/u/Pessimisticsteel

/u/Adhdferret

/u/MirrorMan

/u/GumpyBastard

/u/DKeere

/u/Chaoticneutral

/u/Justintoxicated

/u/ScorpioGlitch

/u/Chiefpacman

/u/X175B247

/u/ninjajunkie

If I missed any of you, I didn't do it on purpose. And to all the future users who might reply to that initial post, I won't forget you either. Thanks.

I wrote up my AskPhuks yesterday out of anger and a bit out of disgust with my current state in life. I'm writing this post right now because I want to say the same thing to ALL of the users who commented, and I think its easier doing it this way than replying the same thing to dozens of different comments in that thread. After reading all of your responses I feel better about my situation. All of you who replied gave me a lot of words of encouragement. If I didn't know any better I would have thought that you all were a remnant of my grandpa, logging in with different usernames to drop snippets of sound advice. In a way, you *were* doing that. So thank you, Grandpa Phuks. Many of you echoed each other without realizing it. The common denominators in your arguments were that my time on this earth is more valuable than anything else. You taught me that I needed to focus on my true *needs* instead of the *wants* that society was putting into my head. You all spoke of how I should change my mindset, and that once I did that an entirely new set of possibilities would make themselves known to me. You all repeated the same thing : work hard. I understand that. The reason for my despair yesterday was that I *have* been working hard and I just don't seem to be getting anywhere. But you guys stopped me in my crybaby state and pointed something out : Quit your bitching and look at all of us. We are *all* working hard for the little bit we have in this life. Seriously, thank you all. Today I have off from work, and I'm going to organize my cashflow like you said. I will write up a ledger and begin to track every phukking penny that comes and goes in my life. I'm going to start being social to the point of discomfort, networking nonstop. I'm going to look at local places around me that need help or require a service. I woke up today and cringed when I remembered what I had wrote yesterday. I was expecting to log in and see a lot of you guys putting me down and snubbing my tears. I was expecting my post to have been buried and forgotten. That wasn't the case though. You motherphukkers responded truthfully. And now my kvetching is on the front page to remind me that I'm still a soft crybaby at times, but also that people do care. I love you phuks. /u/CDanger /u/Sarcastaway /u/E-werd /u/Polsaker /u/unabashed_centrist /u/KillEmAll /u/saverem /u/chmod /u/hereforaminuet /u/Mattvision /u/Pessimisticsteel /u/Adhdferret /u/MirrorMan /u/GumpyBastard /u/DKeere /u/Chaoticneutral /u/Justintoxicated /u/ScorpioGlitch /u/Chiefpacman /u/X175B247 /u/ninjajunkie If I missed any of you, I didn't do it on purpose. And to all the future users who might reply to that initial post, I won't forget you either. Thanks.

10 comments

[–] E-werd 1 points (+1|-0)

Hmm, I think if you would have done @ at the beginning of the names rather than /u/ then everybody would've gotten a notification. As it stands, we didn't. Not a big deal, just letting you know.

Thanks for the acknowledgement for that thread. We all get in a bad head space from time to time, shit happens. Life is tough and finding satisfaction isn't easy, but remember that you cannot change the world but you can change yourself. It's easy to say this, too, but it's quite another to actually do it. I'm working on that, it seems to be coming slowly with age. Wisdom is wasted on the old, just like youth is wasted on the young.

Dang, I was hoping it would ping you guys. Thanks for the heads up!

Either way, you phukkers really helped me out. I'm very thankful to have found this place, and I'm glad you guys found it too.

I could never have gotten these responses from a place like voat. Maybe reddit...but to me it counts more that a small place like Phuks is where I got it from.

[–] DKeere 1 points (+1|-0)

Bitch, I'm 35, lol. Grandpa my ass.

But seriously, I offer advice while at the same time I'm still learning.

[–] ScorpioGlitch 1 points (+1|-0)

No worries. It's just part of being human where you are. We all went through that. For some of us, it was traumatic realizing that it was really tough getting to that influential point and then realizing that it was even tougher getting to a point where you could change the world or just getting to a point where you didn't have to do something in poverty for forever.

It's normal. Don't beat yourself up. This is what elders are for, huh?

[–] Adhdferret 1 points (+1|-0)

Skillet we all want to HELP a fellow phuk, but we won't do it for you, and that isn't because of any other reason than the way we do shit ain't the same that will work for you, and even more than just that you need to do it yourself and gain that small amount of confidence.

Now let's take my situation.....hurt at work and screwed for better part of a year with no recourse and I just found ways to make it. I asked for help which honestly was the hardest thing. That sucked more than waiting in line at the local church from 6am to 9am just to avoid the lines.

You went that mile already and asked for help. I know how hard it is which is why I did what I did. Wish it could have got to you in a better way.

[–] sidewalker_Principle [OP] 1 points (+1|-0) Edited

Ferret, my main man, you did more in that one moment than anybody I've ever come into contact has done combined. Now that might be a little stretch, but in my heart it seems true.

And I absolutely know what you mean. You phuks can only show me the door. I have to walk through it myself. Its like training to be a ninja. The master cannot tell you the answer to the zen koan. The student must ascertain that reality for themselves. Exactly how you say I need to do it myself so I can build that confidence.

I honestly didn't even reach out for help in that moment with you. I was being sort of sarcastic of my own situation ("yay peanutbutter and coffee for breakfast!"). That was my true reality at that point, and I was simply mocking myself in chat.

You took it upon yourself to lend a hand. And like I said before, and will continue to say it, I am eternally grateful to you.

I'm not a mooch. I'm not a freeloader (unless you count walking through the grocery store and filling up on the free samples). So I do not ever expect anybody to give me shit. And I was totally blown away when you helped me.

Either way, sob story is over and my crybaby ass has grown up a little in the past 24 hours. I'm looking forward now to making myself a better person.

[–] Adhdferret 1 points (+1|-0)

Na skillet I did nothing that hasn't been done for me. Trust me on that. Was just that I saw someone I could help and therefore did something, and my only hope is you do the same. Honestly doesn't have to be money either.

See someone struggling to do something and you can do something.....fucking do it. I helped my neighbor move his shed the other day.......yeah it hurt me pretty bad and all that because of my back, but still did it because he obviously needed help.

I don't need praise at all. What we all need is just some help and for some reason it seems we all have this aversion to asking for it. Don't know why either because I am the same way.

Might be pride lol. Pretty sure that is what it is with me anyways. I have always kept shit bottled up with myself. Just who I am. Thing is that way I was raised is family first, community second and always help your fellow man, even if he wouldn't help you.

Bitterness gets us all fucked in the long run.

[–] Dudicles 1 points (+1|-0)

I haven't been online much the past week, so I missed the thread yesterday.

I have a relatively uncomplicated spreadsheet I use to manage bills and see how much money I am saving (or spending) from month to month. I can send you a copy of the template if you'd like. I would probably have to put some false numbers in it so you can see how it works from the get-go.

Sure, I'd love any and all input. I'm trying to think of a good way to make my own from scratch, but I would definitely be able to use something to go off of.