I had a big wedding. The ceremony was supposed to be outside at this quaint forest next to the country club neither of us had ever been to, but it rained hard, so the wedding was inside next to the reception area. The reception was huge, 300+ people with open bar. I still have friends telling me how great that wedding was even though I got divorced a decade ago.
It's really not worth it even if you can afford it. Her parents were loaded, mine were decently well off, I had to schedule it to not have my first three choices for best men be available...that sucked hard. One was deployed, one had a play opening that weekend, the other was in Nigeria for social work. I ended up having my brothers, a few cousins and 3 drinking buddies to get to the 7 groomsmen I needed. It was a fun wedding for sure, but my god, that was expensive for something that lasted only 3-4 years.
See? Thats what I mean. I can't justify spending so much money just for one day. My girlfriend is getting married in September and I declined being in the bridal party because I couldn't justify buying a dress, and shoes, and makeup for just ONE day. I still plan on getting married one day, but I just dont know how I can justify the costs and everything. Especially because if it doesn't work out, thats just money I lost and could've put towards bills or whatever,.
The weddings are really for the parents, not the participants. Being European decent that is important. I can't start to explain the shitshow that occurred when my brother got married in Vegas.
At the same time, that money could really go a long way for a new couple. Formalities get in the way, they are important to preserve, but they are a ludicrous money hole.
fuck i was JUST about to post this! I mean when I get married, I'd like to have a big wedding (I'm European) but I also understand if the funds aren't available, they aren't available. Either put the money towards what you REALLY WANT in the wedding, or go to the courthouse and throw a party when you can afford to.