My feelings about death come and go. Sometimes I convince myself that it would be fine, everything would be fine if I died... other times, I feel like it would be a very, very bad thing for those left in my wake. Sometimes I'm not scared of what lies beyond, usually when I convince myself that there is a consciousness beyond life. Sometimes I'm terrified, usually when I convince myself that there is nothingness and I just cease to exist in any form.
Fuck. Death is too uncertain and that's terrifying. At this point I'm not suicidal because of that fact.
In a related vein, I often do this thing where I kind of step outside my conscious and look around, consider that everything around me is actually real or perhaps that it's not. When I do this, I'm no longer mentally part of my life up to that point... just kind of stepping back and taking a look around. It's weird and takes me a little bit to snap back to reality.
My feelings about death come and go. Sometimes I convince myself that it would be fine, everything would be fine if I died... other times, I feel like it would be a very, very bad thing for those left in my wake. Sometimes I'm not scared of what lies beyond, usually when I convince myself that there is a consciousness beyond life. Sometimes I'm terrified, usually when I convince myself that there is nothingness and I just cease to exist in any form.
Fuck. Death is too uncertain and that's terrifying. At this point I'm not suicidal because of that fact.
In a related vein, I often do this thing where I kind of step outside my conscious and look around, consider that everything around me is actually real or perhaps that it's not. When I do this, I'm no longer mentally part of my life up to that point... just kind of stepping back and taking a look around. It's weird and takes me a little bit to snap back to reality.
My feelings about death come and go. Sometimes I convince myself that it would be fine, everything would be fine if I died... other times, I feel like it would be a very, very bad thing for those left in my wake. Sometimes I'm not scared of what lies beyond, usually when I convince myself that there is a consciousness beyond life. Sometimes I'm terrified, usually when I convince myself that there is nothingness and I just cease to exist in any form.
Fuck. Death is too uncertain and that's terrifying. At this point I'm not suicidal because of that fact.
In a related vein, I often do this thing where I kind of step outside my conscious and look around, consider that everything around me is actually real or perhaps that it's not. When I do this, I'm no longer mentally part of my life up to that point... just kind of stepping back and taking a look around. It's weird and takes me a little bit to snap back to reality.